The Profound Impact of 'Being' Over 'Doing' in Leadership

As parents, leaders, and individuals, the words we say and the actions we take often define us. We meticulously craft our messages, strategies, and plans—the "doing." However, a frequently overlooked yet immensely powerful factor is our 'way of being,' the presence, intent, and energy we bring to our actions.

A Simple Experiment

Imagine a familiar scenario at home: you're speaking to your teenage child.

You ask, "Have you finished your homework? I noticed you've been on your phone a lot. I want to make sure you're staying on track."

Now, envision this statement spoken in two different ways:

1. From an authoritative, demanding, and stern perspective.

2. From a concerned, supportive, and caring standpoint.

While the words remain unchanged, the impact they have can vary tremendously depending on the underlying attitude or 'way of being.'

Taking this example into consideration, let's explore the depth of this concept further.

'Doing' vs. 'Being': A Deeper Dive

The words in the statement symbolize our 'doing': our strategies, directives, and tasks. It's the tangible aspect we often prioritize.

However, the tone, intent, and energy with which those words are conveyed embody our 'way of being.' It's less tangible but plays a pivotal role in how our messages are received.

You might have the perfect strategy in place, but if communicated with impatience or indifference, its efficacy might wane. Conversely, an imperfect plan delivered with genuine concern and clarity can rally people, foster trust, and achieve desired outcomes.

This balance between 'doing' and 'being' is akin to planting a seed. The seed (the action or 'doing') requires fertile soil (the right 'way of being') to flourish. An exceptional seed might struggle in infertile ground, while even an average seed can thrive in nurturing soil.

But words alone are just one side of the coin. Real-world applications of these concepts can highlight their transformative potential.

Rajiv's 10/10 Leadership Commitment: A Case Study

Amidst a series of fatal accidents in his factory, Rajiv, a CEO, believed his commitment to safety was stellar, rating it a high 9 out of 10. On the walls of the entry hall hung the company's safety mantra: "Safety is Job Number One.” Yet, despite significant investments in protocols and consultants and town hall speeches, the accidents continued. As his executive coach, I wondered aloud if that one missing point in his commitment could be pivotal.

Facing a subsequent accident, Rajiv's response was transformative. He personally tended to an injured janitor, signaling a shift from mere enforcement of rules to nurturing genuine care. When the janitor was cleared to go home for rest, Rajiv personally drove him in his car, and had tea with the man and his wife. Rajiv replaced the factory’s safety mantra with "10/10 Safety Commitment, Everyone, Everywhere,” prompting a cascade of introspection among his leadership team about what a full commitment to safety entailed.

Rapidly, a new culture emerged. In two weeks, the factory reported zero incidents. Morale soared, and productivity spiked. It wasn't a change in safety procedures but a metamorphosis in attitude—moving from control to compassion—that made the difference.

Reflecting on this transformation, Rajiv later remarked, "True commitment can't be dictated from the top down. It has to be felt and embraced by each individual." The difference between a 9/10 and a 10/10 commitment might seem trivial, but it's in that small increment that profound change is catalyzed.

Drawing from Rajiv's experiences, let's reflect on our own leadership journeys.

Reflecting on Leadership and Personal Interactions

As leaders, how often have we focused solely on our plans, neglecting the energy with which we present them? Recollect moments when the outcome of an interaction wasn't as anticipated. Could the 'way of being' during its execution have played a part?

Similarly, think about times when challenges were navigated successfully due to a positive attitude or 'way of being,' even if the plan wasn't flawless.

Building on these reflections, one must also consider the tangible qualities that leaders must cultivate.

Choosing and Cultivating Key Leadership Qualities

The embodiment of specific leadership qualities can significantly enhance one's leadership presence. As a practical exercise, I often invite leaders to introspect and select 2 or 3 qualities that they feel most resonate with them or that they wish to develop further. Some of these qualities include being Adaptable, Charismatic, Collaborative, Empowering, Inspiring, among others.

But personal introspection isn't enough. Leadership is as much about perception as it is about intent. Hence, once leaders have chosen their desired qualities, the next step is seeking feedback. I recommend a simple exercise: Ask colleagues, team members, or peers to rate them on a scale of 1 to 10 based on their embodiment of the selected traits. Additionally, encourage them to provide feedback on what a 10/10 manifestation of those qualities would look like. Such feedback not only offers a reality check but also gives a clear direction for growth.

I call this process, Leadership DNA Upgrade. The link will give you lots more information and tips.

Equipped with feedback and introspection, leaders can truly embrace their 'way of being'.

Embracing 'Being' in Leadership

The challenge for modern leaders is not just to strategize and act but to reflect upon and consciously choose their 'way of being' in every interaction. Before any significant discussion or decision, pause and introspect: "How am I choosing to show up?"

By making this subtle yet profound shift in focus, leaders can transform their interactions, foster better relationships, and achieve more impactful results.

Closing Thoughts

In leadership, as in life, while 'doing' is essential, it's our 'way of being' that determines how we're perceived, how we connect, and ultimately, how successful we are. As you navigate your leadership journey, remember that the right attitude, presence, and energy can open doors, even if they seemed previously shut.